Deal with it

I think one of the most difficult things Jesus asks us to do is forgive.

If you follow the Christian faith, you know that one must forgive to be forgiven. Not to mention there are studies that show harboring hate is bad for one’s health.

The Lord forgives us and we are to do the same.

But I can’t lie; releasing people can be hard.

Funny thing about hurt and wrong doings and this business of forgiveness; these instances usually morph into other incidents that compound the situation.

Through the years I’ve discovered that “the event” also triggers unreasonable and unrealistic thoughts and expectations. We torment ourselves by speculating to no end the reasons why and we can concoct stuff that didn’t happen, we put words in folks mouths that they never said. Our whole perception of the event becomes skewed and we recall those moments like they happened yesterday. No longer are we hurt and bitter about the event whatever that might have been, now we’re angry over what we think somebody said or thought.

This is madness.

As difficult as forgiveness can be; as hard as it is to let folk go, I’m all for it if it eliminates the mind games. If it dismisses the lies, if it kills all the speculation and the who did what when.

Another saying that was recently challenged was this: I don’t need you. I’m finding out that that may not always be true. You tell yourself I don’t need him/her but the truth is you just might. It’s the lie we tell ourselves to comfort ourselves but only temporarily. The truth may look like, I need you but I don’t want to need you. You’ve disappointed me, you hurt me, you don’t seem to care so I will attempt to convince myself that I don’t need you.

This too is madness.

It’s time to make peace.

It’s time to forgive.

It’s time to deal with it.

It’s time to stop telling ourselves lies and it’s certainly time out for all the speculation.

I’ve got my own to-do list in this area.

How about you?